Truth: Hating The Law of Attraction Doesn’t Work
I first heard about it years ago when the popular movie, The Secret, was released. But in an effort to make the movie mainstream, I think it lost so much of its appeal to those like me – that didn’t want to necessarily be a magnet for millions of dollars, but simply a happy and healthy life. It was too fantastical….and, cheesy.
So, I bought the more authentic-feeling books by Esther and Jerry Hicks who share their teachings of The Law of Attraction. Esther and Jerry get their teachings from Abraham, a group of channeled entities. Whoa. At that point in my life, it was so insanely over my head, I wrote it off as bullshit. All I could think were things like….
- These people are getting this information from where? And how do we know it’s true?
- Whaaaa….? Our thoughts and emotions can bring ANYTHING to us?
- We are in control of our realities? I don’t want THAT much responsibility
- Every single (really really?) experience that shows up is something we asked for in some way through thought?
I decided I hated the Law of Attraction. Well let me tell you, that definitely didn’t help my life get any better…. And then, thanks to an amazing therapist I was seeing at the time, I was able to give it another, fairer, look.
The Law of Attraction exists and is working, whether you like it or not. If you end up using it for your benefit or to your detriment, it is still be working in the background of our lives. And, there is no way I would ever play a game without reading the rules so I decided to give it another shot. Living without knowing how The Law of Attraction works was scarier than facing it, head on. So, I took a leap of faith and decided to play the game according to the “rules” I learned.
Here they are.
Basics of The Law of Attraction
Principle #1: “That which is like unto itself, is drawn.” – Abraham
In other words, “like attracts like.” Our bodies, as is this world, are full of vibrational frequencies. Disease can only live in a low vibration environment. Health can only happen in a high vibrational environment.
Similar vibrational frequencies attract each other. Some examples are:
- Frequencies of love attract more love
- Frequencies of fear attract more experiences that cause fear
- Frequencies of “lack” (money, love, health) attract more “lack”
(When you focus on wanting more because you don’t have enough, you are sending out a negative vibration)
- Whatever you give attention to, grows (whether you want it or not)
In fact, I saw this principle proven plain as day when I attended a healing workshop a few years ago. The presenter was going to give an example about healing from cancer, so he asked the audience members with cancer to raise their hands. Literally, 95% of those with cancer were seated next to each other in one long row of chairs. It was obvious to the entire crowd of over 500 people. When the presenter realized the “irony,” he asked if they knew each other. Astoundingly, almost none of them knew each other and that each other had cancer. They had just been drawn together. The negative frequency of cancer attracted more of that. Hello Law of Attraction, right?
Principle #2: Our vibrational frequencies come from thoughts and emotion.
Thoughts and emotions manifest in your vibrational frequency. Your vibration is the “signal” you are broadcasting out into the world, to draw more to you. Thoughts alone cannot easily attract either positive or negative though – the important piece behind the thought is our emotional vibration. But, changing our thoughts can help shift our emotional vibration and then, viola, we can attract the positive.
If you are constantly looking at the negative and feeling the negative, you can expect to draw more of that to you. On the flip side, if are you focusing on the positive and that which makes you feel good, you can expect to draw more of that to you.
That’s why gratitude and being thankful for what you DO have, changes peoples lives. Nothing positive ever comes from focusing on the lack and the negative (unless you want more of that?)
Goal: You want the overall vibration of your being to be high. This doesn’t mean one slip up into a negative thought or pity party will send everything plummeting. You just want to work on overall emotional and vibrational health so you are a strong antenna for other positive vibrations in the Universe.
Principle #3: Your Inner Being Communicates Through Emotion
Learning this was a lightbulb moment for me! I love this principle of the Law of Attraction. Some people refer to this “inner being” as your “higher self,” “soul,” or “core.” This is the part of you that only wants you to experience joy and love and not experience feeling bad, seeing yourself as unworthy or unlovable and other negative beliefs and emotions we can tend to dive right in to. The teachings of Abraham say that your emotions are indicators of either a “match” or “mismatch” in what you are thinking/feeling and what your inner being is wanting. When you become out of alignment with what your inner being wants, you feel this as negative emotion. You are essentially feeling the separation of yourself from you inner being/knowing.
You can see this example in anything from not speaking your truth, to taking a job that isn’t right for you, to thinking about something that drags you down (your emotions and body will give you signals this doesn’t feel good).
Again, the goal is to make a shift to a place where you are in alignment with your inner being so your overall vibration is rockin’!
Principle #4: You Can Change Your Reality Completely, By Changing Your Focus
The more positive you think and feel, the better you will think and feel.
Oxymoron, right? If you felt better, you’d be able to feel better!
So, the important thing here is that while you are focused on a problem, or the negative, you cannot easily attract or manifest positive. I realize this is a little mind-blowing and overwhelming, but hang tight. I’m going to show you how to shift this.
This was so apparent to me when I was sick. For awhile, I constantly focused on the symptoms, read about the drugs I was taking, learned about viruses and bacteria invading my body – but pretty soon I realized that so wasn’t working. If you focus on that, whether you have 5% to go to the finish line of total health, or 95%, you are making a choice to be entrenched in the very thing you do not want. Does that make any sense at all?
When I got so sick of being on top of everything that I stopped caring enough to obsess over each disease and symptom I had, stopped taking all my supplements, and stopped doing what felt good to my doctor, but bad for me…I started to attract actual solutions that could help me heal. (Note: Please do not stop taking your doctor’s advice. I am simply sharing my own experience). It was simply because I stopped making my whole life about “illness” and “problems.”
Need some new way of looking at things? This quote says it all: “A thousand things went right today.” ~Ilan Shamir
Principle #5: The Good News Is That Thing Don’t Manifest Instantly (but it’s the bad news too, of course)
The process of changing your thoughts and emotions happens little by little. It all adds up to changing your energy and your vibration over time. But that’s also awesome because it means if you get into a negative spot, you aren’t going to immediately attract crap into your life. Phew.
Changing your thoughts and emotions take conscious work for sure. But there is nothing more rewarding. It’s a subtle shift from always focusing on what’s going wrong, to always (or almost always) focusing on what’s going right (yes, even if there doesn’t seem to be much of it).
But HOW?! A Cheat Sheet to Shifting Your Sh*t….
This takes practice, but I promise if you stick with it, it will work. I went from a place of such illness and financial poverty to the exact opposite and I believe so much of it had to do with my shift in focus. When I received my stem cell transplant in India (which by the way practically fell in my lap when I finally wasn’t focusing on illness as much), I was literally catapulted into another culture: “the mind leads and the body follows.” I was not allowed to focus on the symptoms and the sucky things each day. My doctor there simply would not stand for it and would immediately say “the stem cells help heal your body along with your mind. They do not kill or address disease at all.” When I attempted to add my two cents about this bacteria or toxin, she would bring me back to the focus on bringing my body up, toward healing. And I healed exponentially faster than so many others that resisted her insistence away from the talk of disease specifics. She knew very well what she was doing….and I see that now.
Years later, I learned the same about financial security. When you worry and focus on the “problem” or the lack of financial security, NOTHING good will come from it. Nothing. When I decided to literally focus on every little financial “win,” and get rid of fears around money, my financial situation turned right around. And faster than I thought it could too.
Same with love. When I stopped believing all love was destined to hurt me, I stopped getting hurt….and got married instead.
Important: Focusing on a Solution is a Go!
While focusing on symptoms, discontent and more is negative, focusing on a solution can invoke the positive.
The shift on that would look like: Instead of “I’m taking medicine because this virus is destroying my body and it’s so out of control I have to center everything around trying to kill it,” you’d shift to “I am taking this medicine to help heal my body and healing my body and being able to do the things I love feels good.”
Omg, how much better is that?!
Easy Steps to Start With
They worked for me, and I believe they will work for you too.
1. Make a conscious effort to change your thinking and your focus.
If you are in pain, focus on the inch of your body that’s not in pain. If you are broke, hold the dollar in your wallet and focus on that. Start monitoring (not judging, but monitoring) your thoughts. You’ll be blown away by what goes on in your head every day. Stop when you find yourself talking about or thinking about what you don’t want, and immediately start telling yourself what you do want.
Example: “I don’t want this pain. I can’t stand this pain” changes to “I want to feel good in my body. I want to be able to walk easily and freely.” Do not use any negative words when you shift your talk, because whatever you focus on, grows. And you are trying to grow the positive, which is what you do want. If you focus on “I don’t want to feel this way,” you are giving your focus to feeling that way and attracting that very thing.
2. Invoke positive emotion.
I’m not at all saying to ignore the negative (trust me, I tried and that definitely doesn’t work). But, acknowledging it and then choosing to shift your thinking and feeling to something positive does work. By asking yourself WHY you want something, you can bring up the positive emotion that will help you attract more of it.
Example: “Why do I want this healthy body?” Your answer may be something like: “So I can travel again, so I can work full-time doing something I love, so I can be a part of the family more, etc.” All of these things will bring up the positive emotion that will shift your vibration to a positive place.
Take it one step further and visualize traveling, working, and doing all the things that feel good to you. Pay attention to how you feel when you’re doing this shifting and visualizing. If something feels bad to visualize (even if it’s seemingly positive), find something else to focus on that invokes only positive emotion. Our hidden fears and agendas can sometimes bring up negative emotion so pay careful attention to this.
3. Release negative energy.
The way I did this was through energy therapy techniques. For me, as is true for many of my clients, subconscious beliefs and emotions also play a part in creating blocks for our lives – and this is a good way to access and release that part of things.
Hanging onto negative emotional energy is bogging down your vibration. The more you release, the less you are vibrating at a level of attracting more of that. Releasing energy about fear of illness for me, I believe has really helped me stay healthy and strong. Releasing old stuff about money has prevented me from going back to a place of, well, being broke.
Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) is a simple and very effective self-healing too for releasing emotions.
Where To Go From Here
The awesome news is it will become pretty obvious when things start to shift for you – you’ll notice your circumstances don’t shake you like they used to (you’re able to find the positive in the not-so-fun times), you’re not as drawn to negativity (including people, gossip and TV shows that might make you feel unhappy), and it will start to be clear just how much you misfocused your energy in the past.
The Most Important Thing To Remember
This is not about blame. I truly believe it’s our job to do what we can to hold a positive vibration, BUT we live in a big ol’ Universe that’s always conspiring for us too. Timing is divine and sometimes things are just doing what they need to do because of something we can’t see. It’s important to not blame ourselves when things don’t happen like we intend, but instead to just keep on doing what we can and know it’s all working out for the greater good.
Now you have the basic principles. Get out there and use ’em, ok? The more you do, the easier it will get.
And if you want to read more, visit my Awesome Books page for some great stuff.by